Wednesday 8 February 2017

You Can't Be A Good Woman To Him If You Are A Not Good Woman To Yourself

Women keep breaking their heads : why do their men take them for granted when they are being good to them? You do everything to satisfy his every need. You are a definition of a real ,good woman ,just how your mom taught you: your cleaning and cooking skills are out of this world,you take care of your home ,you don't do anything a woman should not do and you obey your man and take care of him like he is your baby.
So how come he doesn't seem to be exited about having you as his lady?
You try so hard to do everything "to the book" and you can't seem to understand what are you doing wrong?
Why you can't have a fulfilled relationship with your man where he appreciates your efforts and everything you add into his life?

Since we were little girls we were taught that "good woman" must not put herself first. That our purpose is to take care of everything and everyone else before ourselves.
That is why ,through generations women face exactly the same frustrations in relationships,because no one ever told them that in order to have people around you happy ,you need to be happy with yourself first.

Even when you prepare him the most delicious meal he would prefer to eat outside if you are all the time angry,frustrated,over sensitive,passive and negative.
Believe it or not,the most precious thing we can give out to people around us is our VIBE.
That vibrant,contagious positive,energy and that undeniable sex-appeal that comes out of self confidence and self love.

And for that my dear,you need to do you first.

Self love is not an empty word,it  requires loving actions as well. Effort.
If you don't feel good about yourself ,stop making excuses and work on it. If you can't change it,then learn how to make a peace with it.

Women can sit,eat,cry about their weight and complain about girls exposing their bikini bodies on social media . Haba.
Once you are not feeling good in your own skin,you won't feel good about the world around you and you will find reasons for negativity in everything and anything. Then meanness becomes a form of self defense and consolation.
Imagine a frequency of such attitude. No normal human being would want to be around you.
Pay attention on yourself.If you notice you are being petty,moody and mean-it's a sign that you should definitely change something about yourself and your lifestyle,because it's not others you have a problem with.
And by change,I don't mean fixing your hair,buying a waist trainer or getting a help from a professional make up artist once in a while.No.
I mean things that will make you fall in love with yourself bare naked. Do things that are will help you keep your spirit negativity free. That will help you win good mood daily. Distract your mind from toxic thoughts about people,situations and yourself.
Explore your potentials,stop letting them rot .Start working out. Dance classes. Yoga. Something that
will help you renew your mind,body and soul. Remember your secret passion. Embrace it,work on it. Read. Expand your knowledge. Feed yourself with informations that will make your heart smile,not with ones that upsets you. Meditate. Try and making home made organic face masks,light a candle,drink a glass of wine : your private spa moment if you can't afford professional ones. Eat right. Eat healthy. Drink water.Lots of water.When you eat heavy,fried food you become even more lazy and angry. Jealous and insecure. Guilty. Anxious.

You can't tell me that a good woman is one who abounded herself.

The way your man sees you is just a direct reflection of how you feel about yourself.

You think that good woman means a good housewife. A servant. A cook. Not really.
Your purpose as someone's partner is way deeper and it's to inspire them and help them get the best out of themselves and in order to be capable of doing such you need to work on getting the best out of yourself first.

This is 21st century and there is nothing appealing about desperate,unhappy,unfulfilled  housewife.
Quit with excuses and find a way to make time for yourself.

Selfish is to request from someone to see in you what you can't see yourself ,not putting yourself as your own priority.

Remember,
You can't pour from an empty cup.

Work on being  the energy you want to receive.

26 comments:

  1. And this is exactly what we see in our society all tha fckin time: angry bitter frustrated women dat have time 2 mind other ppls businesses but no time to work on themselves.

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  2. very nice sonia u are oprah of africa. much inspired xoxo

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  3. I am a guy,but you are very right ...

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  4. Again u hv made me a better person and a better woman. U deserve a recognition i swear. love u .ur blog is keeps me in a right kind of a mood

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  5. ladies she made a good point

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  6. U make me feel better about myself. Thanks doll

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  7. And any man that loves his woman would not stop her from working on herself .It's ok for a woman to look after her man but she is not a servant and no normal man wud let u kill urself catering to him

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  8. I always check your blog every day to get something new to add to my life... You are one of the best gifts to womankind

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    1. Same here. She is a Blessings to womenkind especially us african women . We need u sonia

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  9. Sonia u are a dirty bitch why dont u tell pippl dat u left ur husband to do prostitution abroad u r not in nigeria for many months u did jaz on dis man to marry u at d first plc bcs i dont see how a hoe like u got married. Soon ur jaz wil bckfire u idiot n he will go n look for his nigerian bride . U r so stupid n annoying. Ugly bitch uglyyy

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    1. get a life oloshi

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    2. But seriously who are you😂😂😂😂

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    3. But seriously who are you!!???!LMAO

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    4. You sure a low life whoever comments sure rubbish,I got this you where expecting her husband to get married to you bcx your are from Africa ������ you sure a Fool you still need to grow up

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    5. U have a problem!!! u need help, go to a psychiatrist!!!

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    6. Seriously who is talking butterfly like you go and sit down my friend nonsense

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  10. I don't usually comment but manhhh like seriously? This much of jealousy n wickedness!! I can't stand nonsense. Some people are so freaking retarded. Hatred is toxic. This is rarely both refreshing and highly educational platform that helps women all across Africa in so many days and I recently started following the author and she is just amazing and you can't fake that. And then u find idiots like this one commenting BULSHIT. It's really a shame. Do you think you can make someone change their mind by talking nonsense? What exactly is the purpose of such act? Sonia please keep doing ur thing,this fools are so irrelevant. Keep touching lives. Bless you

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  11. Love it!!! Very pertinent. Ladies, try to have some time for yourselves once in a while. It will do you a lot of good. Madam when are u coming back? We miss you here o!

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  12. This is real ohhh women must put themselves first. Happy wife happy family and life

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  13. Indeed is a blessing to womankind especially african women.Haters always gonna hate because they don't feel good about themselves and see progress as an objection.I have learnt something new today all thanks to Mrs Sonia your are such an inspiration.praise GOD for blessing the world with someone like you.Keep doing you and been you.Xoxo from Cameroon

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  14. I have never seen your kind of celebrity before. You should write a book. You really touch people's lives . You changed the way I see life. Thank you for that

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  15. I love this "The way your man sees you is just a direct reflection of how you feel about yourself". Very profound. You can't really love someone if you don't love yourself enough.
    www.memoirsofagreatlady.com

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  16. Keep a good work ma

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  17. I discovered your blog today and have been on it for past 3 hours. I know this will be my new addiction. Love from
    DC

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